Having a partner with a sex obsession or love addiction can be deeply upsetting and all consuming. First and foremost, we understand the feelings you are having right now and you are not alone in them. Sexual and emotional betrayal manifests itself in many ways and common feelings can include shock, humiliation, deception, manipulation and betrayal. Most hurtful of all is that these feelings are caused by someone you love. It is important for you to remember that you are not to blame for this situation. You did not cause it and the blame does not lie with you.
One of the most important things is that you learn to care for yourself as this crisis is a draining one – both physically and emotionally. Our aim is to help you find your sense of self-validation and recognise that others have found themselves in a similar predicament but through our help and support have turned their lives around, thriving and becoming a more confident and reassured person. We will help you to make empowered choices and take ownership of your own needs and sexuality. You will find strength within yourself that you never knew existed. We have been able to help many others with these types of issues and can provide that support to you. If you are experiencing any of the following symptoms, please call us for support and guidance in how to move forward.
Symptoms of betrayal trauma
Emotional reactivity – You may experience excessive emotional reactions and frequent mood swings.
Hyper-vigilance – This can take the form of ‘detective work’ style behaviour. Checking phones, wallets, bank statements or browser history.
Predicting future betrayal – In this state, you may find yourself piecing together innocuous behaviour and events in order to predict times where you may be hurt again.
Being highly reactive – You may notice your spouse staring at another attractive person or coming home late and feel anger, fear or anxiety because of this.
Sleeplessness – You may have nightmares or difficulty focusing on things during the day.
Obsessing – This involves letting the events of the trauma consume you, leaving you unable to focus or making you depressed.
Avoidance – Refusal to think or talk about the trauma, common in people who have had a traumatic experience.
Compulsive behaviours – You may attempt to soothe your anxiety by shopping, eating or exercising more regularly than you usually would.
For information on this type of trauma and related symptoms, please visit our How We Treat page.
The recovery process will start from the first day you walk into a treatment centre.
Many people think that once you have eliminated the addiction that is causing the chaos and devastation in your life and theirs ‘that’s it, problem solved’, unfortunately it’s not that simple. For most people living with any addiction, the substance is only a symptom of the many issues they may have.
These issues may have been buried deep for many years, the substance allows the person to bury these issues further, and it allows that person to block out any true emotions and hide behind anything that maybe too uncomfortable to face.
Recovering From Addiction
Whilst in treatment the person is allowed to explore, probably for the first time, the problems that have been covered up by their using. This process can sometimes be painful, as once the substance has been taken out of the equation they are only left with themselves, and recovery is all about looking at yourself, something you may not have done for a long time.
Addiction leaves you in your own little world, the recovery process in treatment will include many group therapy sessions where you will be encouraged to interact with your peers, giving input into their recovery and them giving input into yours.
Most treatment centres will be staffed by people who are actually in recovery themselves and have many years of experience behind them, they will have been in your position once and will fully understand, they will not be phased or shocked by anything you tell them.
No “Quick Fix” for Recovery
There is no quick fix for instant recovery, taking the substance away is obviously the start, but the recovery process is about the person as a whole. People with addictions seem to be quite unique, they come from all walks of life, there are no set rules, and addiction can affect anyone, at anytime in their lives.
By the time you have finished your stay at the treatment centre, you will be equipped with all you need to go out and apply what you have been taught on a day to day basis.
Within a short space of time family and friends will see a difference in you, way before you actually see it in yourself. You will be offered ongoing support from the centre and you will have met a new set of people who understand you and think the same way as you.
Be the Person You Were Supposed To Be
Recovery is so rewarding, you will see things for what they are, you will appreciate small things that occur in your life, and notice things that have been kept at bay by the fog you were living in. You will have patience and tolerance around situations, and you will stop and think before you act.
You will begin to feel well and have more energy than you know what to do with, you will sleep at night and you will be able to eat. Slowly but surely things that you never dreamt were possible become achievable. Most importantly your life can be free of fear, paranoia, chaos and devastation.
Life can be as normal as you wish it to be. Recovery is precious, and once you have found it, you will not want to let go of it.
1) Cravings are a natural product of addiction. It continues on and off well after drug or alcohol detox. Natural brain chemicals no longer function due to long use of chemicals until the person can’t function properly without them.
Physical recovery can sometimes take as little as ten days, but the Central Nervous System takes longer. This results in extremes of moods like really happy and spiritual one minute and so sad and negative soon after.
2) Cravings are stimulated automatically if recovering person experiences situations that were associated with patterns of former drug/alcohol use. They can include emotions, people, places and things.
3) Gradually being exposed to cravings situations and not using with strong support is a way to weaken cravings (if you do not act, it will pass)
4) Complete Abstinence – which means not getting high on anything, is the surest and quickest way of reducing cravings.
5) Certain old patterns that have not been dealt with, such as loss, childhood issues and destructive relationships can evoke old habits in an otherwise solid recovery.
A house full of people with holes in themselves’ such as rejection, abuse and old patterns of behavior will lead to craving.
6) Determination and will power is a poor defense. Changing your lifestyle is a good one.
7) Even though cravings are a natural after-effect of addiction, remember you have the power of choice. You can take steps to conquer it or remain its slave.
The alcohol related death rate in the UK continued to increase in 2006, rising from 12.9 deaths per 100,000 population in 2005 to 13.4 in 2006. Rates almost doubled from 6.9 per 100,000 in 1991. The number of alcohol related deaths more than doubled from 4,144 in 1991 to 8,758 in 2006.
In 2006 the male death rate (18.3 deaths per 100,000 population) was more than twice the rate for females (8.8 deaths per 100,000) and males accounted for two thirds of the total number of deaths.
For men, the death rates in all age groups increased between 1991 and 2006. The biggest increase was for men aged 35-54. Rates in this age group more than doubled, from 13.4 to 31.1 deaths per 100,000 over the period. However the highest rates in each year were for men aged 55-74.
Death rates by age group for females were consistently lower than rates for males, however trends showed a broadly similar pattern by age. The death rate for women aged 35 -54 doubled between 1991 and 2006, from 7.2 to 14.8 per 100,000 population, a larger increase than the rate for women in any other age group. As for men, the highest rates in each year were for the 55-74 age group.
Between 2005 and 2006, for both sexes, rates remained the same for those aged 15-34 and increased for those aged 35-54 and 55-74. There were small falls in the rates for those aged over 75, down 8 per cent for men and 6 per cent for women.
Current medical evidence shows that men should not regularly drink more than three to four units a day and women not more than two to three. “Regularly” means drinking every day or most days of the week. Consistently drinking more than these amounts can risk damaging your health, with the danger increasing the longer you continue and the more you drink.
Did you know?
There are around 10 million people drinking above the Government’s recommended limits.
Between 15,000 and 20,000 premature deaths in England and Wales each year are associated with alcohol misuse.
Alcohol Abuse – The Facts!
An alcohol fact sheet published by the Institute of Alcohol Studies (IAS) reports that in developed countries, alcohol is the third leading cause of disease and injury, alcohol causing nearly 10 percent of all ill health and premature deaths in Europe. This is ahead of obesity, diabetes and asthma and second only to smoking and blood pressure conditions.
In addition to the large-scale problems of intoxication, addiction and a multitude of alcohol related social problems, alcohol on a worldwide level causes an estimated 20 – 30 percent of cancer of the oesophagus, liver cancer, cirrhosis of the liver, epilepsy, homicide / murder and motor vehicle accidents.
“For advice about addiction, call the Rehab Clinic on 0800 234 3825”
In the 2002 World Health Report, the World Health Organisation estimated that globally 1.8 million people’s deaths every year are directly attributable to alcohol consumption. Moreover, it has been proven that a country’s drinking levels directly parallel the level of harm caused, ie the more a country drinks, the more alcohol-related harm occurs.
The UK is one of the top ten in the world for alcohol consumption per head of population and alcohol abuse is clearly escalating. The Office for National Statistics reported in November 2006 that the alcohol related death rate in the UK doubled from 4,144 deaths in 1991 to 8,386 deaths in 2005.
The death rate may be broken down by gender, with studies indicating that alcohol related death rates are much higher in males. The gap between female and male death rates is increasing and in 2005 the rate was more than twice that of females with males accounting for more than two thirds of the total alcohol related deaths.
Alcohol abuse as a cause of death in the UK has been estimated at 8000 – 40,000 according to the IAS. The lower figure constitutes deaths caused by alcohol defined causes such as chronic liver disease. The upper figure is an estimate of all other deaths in which alcohol has contributed but is not alcohol defined, such as falls, suicide and motor vehicle accidents.
Alcohol misuse within the UK is highest in Scotland. Whilst the population in England drink more frequently, the Scottish population are more likely to exceed recommended daily limits of alcohol with males consuming more than double female alcohol intake. A quarter of women and two in five men in Scotland exceed their daily limit. There were 41,651 alcohol related discharges from hospitals in Scotland alone in 2006/7 which is an increase from the previous year’s statistic of 39,061. According to the Chief Executive of the national charity Alcohol Focus Scotland, ‘the number of people in Scotland hospitalised through drink has soared by 270% in only 15 years.’
Alcohol Related Deaths on the Increase
A recent report from the Office for National Statistics has shown that alcohol related diseases in the UK are killing nearly twice as many women as at the start of the 1990s.
Approximately 30 years ago, alcohol related death rates for men and women in the UK were around two per 100,000, which was the lowest in western Europe. Now, the rate for men is 18 per 100,000, although this is still less than the European average.
For women, particularly In the 35 – 54 year old age group, around 14 women per 100,000 die from conditions such as cirrhosis of the liver and liver failure – and this is well above the European average.
How long does alcohol stay in your system?
Alcohol is broken down by the liver at the rate of approximately one unit per hour (a pint of normal strength beer being two units). Consequently, it is possible to still be under the influence the following morning if you have drunk excessively the night before. In fact, every year in Britain over 25,000 people lose their driving licences the morning after a night\’s drinking.
To exercise caution, the following alcohol calculation can be used to estimate your level of risk after having drunk the night before.
1 Unit of alcohol = ½ Pint ordinary strength beer or…
1 standard glass of table wine or…
1 standard glass of sherry or…
1 single measure of spirits.
It is advised that you allow a minimum of 1 hour per 1 unit of alcohol consumed before driving or operating heavy machinery or electrical equipment in order to ensure that you are not under the influence of alcohol.
In the longer term, regular alcohol consumption increases your risks of: liver damage, cancer (of the liver, mouth, throat, and breast), mental health problems, weight gain, heart disease, stroke, shrunken genitals and reduced fertility. Alcohol reduces your body\’s ability to absorb nutrition, and the weight gain can also contribute to other conditions such as diabetes.
Other notable recent statistics include the number of younger teenagers using drink or drugs. Last year one in seven people admitted to Accident and Emergency departments across the UK for alcohol related health issues were under 14 years old – a total of over 2239 cases.
Drug and alcohol abuse in teens is becoming more of a problem each year as our culture changes. A key statistic is that the average starting age of Heroin use in many towns and cities in the UK is just 15 years of age – so we have an obvious duty to prevent young people from getting inadvertently caught up in addiction through misguided experimentation.
Beating the addiction is just one part of the process of getting clean. To achieve long term sobriety, one needs to be aware of how to best deal with cravings.
Below are some of the most common cravings that an addict faces long after the initial detox and addiction.
The Ten Most Common Dangers of Craving
- Being in the presence of drugs/alcohol or places you used to use in.
- Negative feelings, particularly anger, sadness, loneliness, guilt, fear and anxiety.
- Positive feelings that make you want to celebrate.
- Getting high on any chemical.
- Physical pain.
- Listening to euphoric or war stories or just dwelling on getting high.
- Suddenly having a lot of cash.
- Believing that you’re cured.
- Peer pressure or group pressure.
The government’s Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs has been a focus for media attention in recent weeks. With the dismissal of its Chairman David Nutt and resignation of a further five members, the group faces a difficult few months – but remains as important as ever.
We are gravely concerned about the rapid rise of new and potentially harmful drugs often coined “legal highs”, many of which are inexpensive and readily available to young people. In this field of emerging risks, the ACMD can greatly assist the government in formulating a timely and proportionate response.
For example, before much of the recent press coverage of its dangers, the ACMD recognised the growing trend in abuse of the anaesthetic drug ketamine. The ACMD’s advice subsequently led to the recommendation that ketamine be made illegal — which the Home Secretary and parliament accepted and acted upon. In the current parliamentary session there is a proposal to classify a further five drugs or drug classes, including GBL, BZP and various forms of synthetic cannabis often sold under the name “spice”. All were recommended for classification by the ACMD as a result of a careful analysis of the scientific evidence for physical and social harms.
The Council also has serious concerns about the increasing use of other synthetic drugs such as mephedone, and is proposing a more rapid system of appraising such drugs before they get a foothold on our streets.
In keeping the wider picture of substance misuse under review, the Council periodically publishes in-depth thematic reports. These generally receive less media attention than classification decisions; though often have a more profound impact. As a historical benchmark, the ACMD report in 1988 on AIDS and Substance Misuse led directly to a public health response that today leaves us with one of the lowest rates of HIV amongst injecting drug users in Europe. In recent years, the Council has published reports on the impact on children of drug using parents; the patterns of tobacco, alcohol and illicit drug use by young people; and a proposed strategy to tackle the epidemic of Hepatitis C amongst injecting drug-users. If any of these reports has even a fraction of the long-term impact of the 1988 AIDS and Substance misuse report, the Council will be continuing to prove its worth over and above its input on classification.
Much of the recent comment and news coverage has misunderstood the composition of the Council. Of the total ACMD membership of thirty (prior to the recent resignations), eight are research scientists, covering the fields of pharmacology, chemistry, epidemiology, psychology and social sciences. The majority of members are physicians, psychiatrists and other professionals who deal directly with drug-users and the problems that drugs cause in society. These members have expertise spanning mental health and addiction; drug policy, criminology, forensic medicine, and drug treatment. In addition there are two senior police officers, a judge and a member of the Serious Organised Crime Agency. This diverse group, contributing its time without compensation, is well-placed to offer advice to government on all aspects of illicit drug use.
After recent problems, the Council will have to embark on a period of reconstruction. However, it is important to note the quality of work carried out by the ACMD and the positive impact if has made to drugs policy in this country. Over the 38 years since inception, the vast majority of recommendations made by the group have been accepted by government. This also is true of the present government, notwithstanding the problematic handling of the reports on Cannabis and Ecstasy.
The ACMD and government are working to revise working practices. Part of the approach will focus on the Principles for the Treatment of Independent Scientific Advice put forward by the Royal Society, and currently under review by the Chief Scientist, John Beddington. This should help clarify existing guidelines and allow for the distinction between advice and decision making – but treat the evidence and advisors with the respect and transparency they deserve.
We sincerely believe that the relationship between the Council and government can and must be repaired. It is in the wider interests of society that this process be supported and encouraged.
Fixed Price Alcohol Detox £995
Alcohol home detox aims to rid the body of toxins caused by drinking excessive amounts of alcohol
Home detox affects both mental and physical health. You may have attempted to reduce, control or withdraw from alcohol independently without success. It is advisable that any attempt to withdraw from alcohol be done under the supervision of a trained medical professional
Alcohol detoxification can potentially cause fatalities and result in death.
Side effects/ withdrawal symptoms
- Sickness, shakes and sweats
- Loss of appetite, weightloss, chronic indigestion
- Depression, low mood, anxiety or paranoia
- Hallucinations, palpitations and irregular heart beat
- Risk of fit/seizures
- Suicidal thoughts/self harm
Alcohol home detox assessment
It may be you, a loved one or friend that makes the initial enquiry around Alcohol home detox treatment. Our advisor’s are fully trained, they will be happy to discuss Alcohol home detox treatment and any questions/concerns that you may have around an alcohol home detox programme.
Following your initial enquiry about an alcohol detox Programme, our Doctor/prescribing Psychiatric Nurse will complete an assessment via the telephone. This will be followed by a home visit from our Doctor/prescribing Psychiatric Nurse. Alcohol home Detox will generally take 7-10 days, during this time our client will receive medical monitoring and supervisory calls from our medical professional. Medication may be administered to make the withdrawal symptoms of alcohol detoxification more manageable. It is advisable that you have someone support you throughout your alcohol home detox, however, alternative arrangements can be made if you live alone.
It is vital that you answer questions around your alcohol dependency honestly, this will ensure a safe and individualised alcohol detox treatment plan be drawn up to fully suit your needs.
The initial telephone assessment is free of charge. The cost for the treatment is £995 and this will need to be processed before one of our medical team completes a home visit. The process can generally begin within 1-2 days after initial contact and telephone assessment.
Benefits of Alcohol Home Detox
Suitability – Due to family and work commitments a person may not be able to take time out to entre residential treatment.
Alcohol home detox within the comfort of your own home environment, this may enable a person to continue to manage some aspects of their daily responsibilities.
Private and confidential treatment
Cost effective treatment option with 24 hour support available from medical professional on hand.
Following your Alcohol home detox programme the recovery process is just beginning. We can provide continuing support to prevent relapse and aid recovery. Residential inpatient/outpatient treatment can be arranged in and around your local area.
A structured recovery programme can help us gain some knowledge and understanding around addiction. Give us the tools to helps us live a life of sobriety.
- Supported living/shared housing
- Education/work opportunities
- Recovery and relapse prevention
- Family support
- Meditation and reflection
- Holistic/alternative therapies
- Group support/meetings
Counselling and support services can help a person with understanding addiction. Many of us have encountered difficulties along life’s path that have caused us pain and suffering. Alcohol has acted as a mask, allowed us to hide from our inner thoughts and feelings.
Counselling and psychotherapy can help us unlock out inner self’s, work on the underlying issues and unlock the pain and suffering we have carried throughout life’s journey. With the right support, Alcohol Home Detox – IT WILL BE OK.
The word alcoholic seems to have become greatly misused in modern society. If you tend to drink a little more than you should, then you have automatically become an alcoholic. But there are many different levels of alcohol problems that do not necessarily reflect alcoholism and mean you need alcohol treatment. Drinking behaviour is recognised as four different levels by counsellors and medical practitioners. The levels are social drinking, Hazardous drinking, problem drinking, and alcohol dependence.
The centre of a night out
The social drink is fundamental to how we all socialise in western society. It is often the lubricant that makes socialising easier. But it comes with its own dangers. For a start, alcohol effects how we function. Therefore it can be dangerous if we are driving, operating machinery or taking medication. It may also be used as a “social crutch” too often. While this is a benefit in the early stages, it may lead to long term problems if the individual only deals with some situations with the aid of a bottle of beer or a gin and tonic.
Watch out for the warning signs
A Question of Control
When dependence calls for Alcohol Rehab
This final stage, alcohol dependence can be truly called alcoholism. This is more than just binge drinking, using alcohol as a social support or, out of control drinking. The problem has gone one stage further. Not only is the individuals mind held captive but his/her body has become physically dependant upon alcohol intake.
Now not only does the patient drink to compliment situations or as a support in the here and now, he will take drink to prevent unpleasant withdrawal symptoms. Just as we feel the pangs of hunger when we need food, or the sting of dehydration when we are deprived of water, the alcoholic’s body suffers when deprived of alcohol and he is caught in a vicious cycle. The only way to relieve himself of the severe pains he feels when he is withdrawing from alcohol is to continue to take it. Unfortunately, the body will become tolerant to the effects of the alcohol over a period of time and so the addict will need to take more alcohol to get the same highs, and even more alcohol to prevent the terrifying withdrawal symptoms. In the UK, about 2 in 100 women and about 6 in 100 men are alcohol-dependent.
It is at this stage that addicts seek out the help of alcohol treatment through alcohol rehab centres . Treatment can be given at home through the proper medication and medical supervision but a rehab centre offers the extra positives of moving the alcoholic away from their normal environment, giving constant professional support, addiction counsellors, peer support and the introduction of an environment which is focused on abstinance.
The other important element which most rehab centres offer is an alcohol detox. It is highly likely that due to the acute illness, the patient will need to be admitted while still very much under the influence of drink. Before any therapy or treatment can take place there needs to be a period of detoxification to get all alcohol out of the system.
Alcohol detox is short for alcohol detoxification. Basically it is a medical term that describes the procedures and period of time needed to remove alcohol from the body and allow the patient to go through withdrawal symptoms in a safe environment. Not all people who have issues with their drinking are in need of . It is really used when the body has become dependant upon alcohol.
What are the symptoms of Alcohol dependence?
The first signs of an alcohol problem is that it is becoming the centre of you life. For instance you are not going out to socialise – you are going out to drink. You may find that you cannot enjoy situations if there is no access to alcohol. When you do drink alcohol your friends tell you that your behaviour becomes frightening, or in some way unacceptable. You are tending to spend money on drink rather than the necessities of life which should be put aside for your home and family. You are beginning to find because of the after effects of alcohol it is beginning to affect your work.
These are the early signs of an alcohol problem which could lead to alcohol dependence. This is where you do not only need drink mentally, your physical body is beginning to need alcohol as well. At this stage, the desire for alcohol can start to become overwhelming every minute of the day. Your body is yearning for it like it would normally yearn for food and water. To satisfy the needs, the alcoholic takes in a lot of alcohol. When there is no alcohol intake the body suffers from “withdrawal symptoms”.
Classic withdrawal symptoms are feeling sick, trembling, sweating, distraction, and a craving for alcohol. If withdrawal is really severe then you are likely to suffer from Delirium tremens or the DTs as it is known. The symptoms here are much more acute and include marked tremor and delirium (agitation, confusion, and hallucinations). Some people have convulsions. Complications can develop such as dehydration and other serious physical problems. In some cases the DT’s are fatal.
There are certain warning signs which suggest you may be on the route to alcohol dependence and may need to consider alcohol treatment:
- You have a desire to drink everyday.
- You find you drink alone often simply for the sake of having alcohol.
- When you are without alcohol you have noticed you have started shaking. The only remedy for the “shakes” is to take another drink.
- You drink at unsociable hours. Specifically, you drink early in the morning either to get you out of bed and functioning or to prevent withdrawal symptoms.
Alcohol has become the one goal in your life so you neglect all other interests or pleasures in life.
You are finding you need more and more alcohol to “get you high” or to prevent withdrawal symptoms. This is because your body’s tolerance levels are changing.
Alcohol Detox Treatment
Alcohol Detox normally takes place in an alcohol rehabilitation setting. Medical practitioners will often prescribe medication to help the alcoholic cope with the withdrawal from alcohol. Benzodiazepine medicines such as chlordiazepoxide or diazepam are classically used in alcohol detox situations. It is important to note that these medicines do not stop the craving for drink, they make the withdrawal process easier. At the beginning of the treatment the doctor will probably prescribe a high dose (perhaps the first four or five days) and slowly reduce the dose as the symptoms lessen.
You will also need to replace some of the nutrients your body has lost during the period your life has been centered on drink alone. Therefore it is likely the doctor will also prescribe vitamin supplements.
When the patient has finished alcohol detox he will still have the craving for alcohol and this is where the professional support, counseling and medical input from the alcohol rehab centre is so useful. Medicines such as Acamprosate and Naltrexone can be given to help reduce the craving for alcohol but at the end of the day the alcoholic can not rely on these alone. In the real world he will need the determination, commitment and responsibility to abstain from alcohol himself.